It's 6:50am and I've been at my desk, working, since twenty past six. Only one or two others are here this early, and they're elsewhere on the floor. It's very quiet, and only every third or fourth ceiling fixture is lit. It's very peaceful.
I hear someone get off the elevator, talking loudly on her cell phone and jingling her keys. I hear the noisy flip-flap of sandaled feet approaching from behind.
Coworker: What are you doing sitting in the dark?
Foo: I'm not sitting in the dark.
Coworker: Sure you are. The lights are off.
Foo: Ah… you have infravision. Impressive.
Coworker: Infra what?
Foo: Infravision. You can see in the dark. That's how you saw me with the lights off, right?
Coworker: Oh… well, not all the lights. Some of the lights are on.
Foo: Ah.
Coworker: How can you see what you're doing?
Foo: I'm a touch typist. And see how this magic picture frame glows?
Coworker: …
Foo: My monitor.
Her cell phone bursts into a raucous, fully-orchestrated rendition of “Celebrate” (the Kool & the Gang one; not the Three Dog Night one). She looks relieved.
Coworker: Oopsie! Gotta go!
She jangles off, talking loudly, apparently to herself (ah, bluetooth). There's a loud “CLACK!” as she slaps the entire bank of light switches. Several dozens of harsh fluorescent tubes flare to life, and I feel a little like an escaping convict pinned by a searchlight's beam.
In ten minutes, if no one else walks through the area, the motion detection system will turn off the excess lighting. If I'm lucky.
13 comments:
She sounds ever so charming in so many ways. Thanks for the reminder why I've avoided corporate culture.
@mrs. h: She's actually a very nice lady. I just find it funny that people who would never consider walking up to someone's desk and rearranging his work space don't give a second thought into walking into another group's area, turning on every light in the place, and leaving the area. They like things bright and can't understand why a lot of us programmer types prefer not to “play under the lights”.
Okay - I've been gone WAY too long! What happened to the old template?
I like a lot of light but NOT fluorescent! I would have left the lights off.
I understand your issues with light, but I gotta tell you. For those of us with visual challenges, this new template is a little difficult to read. Of course, I am the one installing those fluorescent bulbs in the house. I think the new blue bulb needs to be reassigned to the front room. It kind of looks like your new page. Hm.
Wow. I like working in the quiet, as well.
She may not know "quiet" at all. Certainly doesn't mind changing it to "noise", does she -which is a good sign I may be right.
@anne: The old template was an old style of code that didn't support the new widget-based Blogger features. I could have reverse engineered it to work the new way, but I have plenty of other work to keep me busy – and frankly, it probably was time for a change anyway.
@turtle: I bumped up the contrast of the text a bit. Is that any better? Or do you just not like blue?
@janie: I have to tell you, this office has a lot of people who love to hear themselves talk and seem to need to surround themselves with a miasma of sound. Picture Pigpen (from the Peanuts cartoon strip) but with a cloud of sound instead of dust.
A couple of the loudest guys were having an extended conversation about their kids' soccer teams, and I actually walked by, interrupted them, and with my best “just kidding (but not really)” grin asked them to please use their inside voices. Which didn't make a decibel of difference.
I don't like clacky non-peaceful people. My work environment is very dimly lit. If you turn on a light people get ticked. You pretty much have to use a small booklight if you need to read something other than your monitor, but thats ok, the darkness is soothing
All I could think of when I read your post title was, Badger, Badger, Badger, Badger....SNAKE! Snnnaaaaaake!
Don't they sell duct tape down there? It's the best stuff ever.
PS. I like the part where he says, "Badger"
So, Mr. Tudball, Missus A-Wiggins strikes again!
@doozie: I have this really awesome Tiffany desk lamp that my dad-in-law gave me a couple Christmases ago. It creates a nice cozy level of light and would be perfect for my cube – except for the folks who have to have all the lights on. I know I'm in the minority, but still… bummer.
@bee: When I chose the post title, I was thinking of the badger song. I assumed no one would “go there” – but you did. How twisted does that make you?
@patty: Pronounced “uh-hwiggins”. Tim Conway is genius.
Twisted for 'Badger-ing' or the duct tape. I assume duct tape.
Maybe it's because I'm one of your few readers that have a handful of kids. We've even gone color coordinated over here. (it comes in pink and green!)
@bee - No, I meant because you were familiar with the Badger song. It's not as well-known as you might think.
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