02 March, 2006

Sing... sing a song

I love to sing, and I suppose there's always been a part of me that dreamt of singing in front of a bunch of people and fantasized that I was good enough at it that they enjoyed the experience.

With or without two-for-one Jell-o shots.

That's probably why I've finally embraced American Idol as one of my guilty pleasures—along with Desperate Housewives, which I watch with Sweetie under the pretense of keeping her company.

I didn't want to like the show. For the first season I succeeded in dismissing it along with such tripe as The Bachelor and Beauty and the Geek; but over time, I caught myself stopping for longer and longer periods when I stumbled upon it while flipping channels. I finally had to admit to myself that I was interested in whether or not the goofy-looking guy with the great voice would triumph over the one with the dreamy eyes and the perfect hair. Among the women, would tone triumph over t— eh... a pleasing aspect?

After all, if I'd been born about 20 years later than I was, with a better set of pipes, and with a more prominent ego, that could be me up there.

Sweetie and I like to watch the performances and then compare notes. I'm usually the one who takes issue with the singers who can't seem to pick a key, so my evaluations are most often in line with Randy Jackson's. Sweetie is more apt to comment on a performer's charisma and appearance and be less critical of blown notes or song choice. She's a better judge of pop idol quality and tends to line up with Paula or Simon.

We spend a lot of time discussing who we like best and why, but one contestant we both agree on this season is Chris, the bald, soul-patched rocker. Last night, Ryan Seacrest announced before a commercial break that Chris would be singing a song by Fuel.

"Gotta be 'Hemorrhage'," I said.

"Do they have any other songs?" Sweetie asked.

"Yeah, but nothing I can remember. Anyway, 'Hemorrhage' is perfect for this guy."

We sat and watched the GEICO gecko while waiting for Chris's performance.

"You realize he's going to nail this, right? That's gonna suck."

Sweetie looked puzzled.

"Why?"

"Well, after he nails it I'm never going to be able to bring myself to sing it at karaoke again. I'll have to retire that from my repertoire."

Yes, that's right. I'm one of those people.

My 10 favorite karaoke songs

  1. Dwight Yoakum, "Fast As You"
  2. Fuel, "Hemorrhage"
  3. Matchbox 20, "Long Day"
  4. The Wallflowers, "Sleepwalker"
  5. Garth Brooks, "If Tomorrow Never Comes"
  6. Roxy Music, "Love Is The Drug"
  7. Cherry Poppin' Daddies, "Zoot Suit Riot"
  8. Stealers Wheel, "Stuck In The Middle With You"
  9. Elton John, "Wake Up Wendy"
  10. Vertical Horizon, "Everything You Want"
Chris nailed his performance, by the way. With "Hemorrhage" off the list, I guess I'll just have to take a run at Travis Tritt's "Here's A Quarter (Call Someone Who Cares)".

Now playing: Yes, Relayer

14 comments:

Anne said...

I am rollin' on the floor! I ONLY like to watch American Idol during all the try-outs. All those people you see who sing soooo bad that you wonder if they are hard of hearing and THEY think they're great - this is true life. I couldn't believe the amount of people I came across in Nashville who were in that city trying to make it big and were horrible!

By the way, if I was in a different place in my life and 20 years younger, I'd be there right along with you. Singing is like oxygen to me and I dread the day if it ever comes that I lose my voice.

I’m not much on karaoke, probably because I don’t get the opportunity. The last time I did it I was pregnant with my and about to pop – makes it hard to get enough air to hold a note for very long. It didn’t matter though – I blew ‘em away anyway.

Thanks for sharing another bit of yourself with us.

Tink said...

I'm an AI tryout junkie myself. I can't watch the show after that because I lose all my courage to ever sing again. And I sing all the time... Where people can't hear me... And where if people hear me there's nothing to throw.

Foo said...

One of my "keeper" memories is of a Christmas about 20 years ago, when the planets aligned in such a way that my two brothers and I were together. The youngest mentioned that he'd seen one of those walk-in recording studios at the mall, and Mom didn't waste any time coercing the three of us to go and record something. So we drove to the mall, walked through the door calling ourselves The Talentless Bucketheads and announced we'd like to make a recording.

Two quick run-throughs, and we were making a recording. Five minutes more and we were giggling ourselves silly over our recording being played over a speaker in the lobby. The payoff: a cassette containing hair-raising renditions of "Rocky Top" and "Elvira" and the expressions on the faces of the passers-by.

Oh, we might have done better if we'd actually practiced the harmonies beforehand and if we hadn't been so nervous, but I don't think there are many family artifacts I treasure more. I don't mean to say that our renditions were good, because they weren't; but I still get a kick out of going back and listening to them (now in MP3 format) just to hear the three of us clowning around in the booth and having a blast.

We still talk about how much fun we'd have if we could ever get together with time on our hands and a KJ in the house, but distance and family responsibilities may prevent that from ever happening.

Bret said...

Soon, oh soon, the light...

Sorry, just can't get into American Idol. I'm too much of a John-Cusack-or-Jack-Black-in-High-Fidelity snob about music, I guess. "Liking both Marvin Gaye and Art Garfunkel is like supporting both the Israelis and the Palestinians."

Jenn said...

I haven't gotten into that show, but I saw part of it last night. I liked the guy that Simon said has an audience of 11-year old girls.

I think he would make it based on that audience... isn't that the audience Clay Aiken appeals to? Anyway, that guy was a cutie, and his voice sounded way older than his looks.

Foo said...

Dear, dear Susie. Of course I've done "Love Shack". It's just not one of my 10 favorites.

We were at this smokey little jernt one Friday night, and Sweetie struck up a friendship with a gal at the next table, as she is wont to do. Neither of them had the nerve to get up and sing by herself, but they decided they could do "Love Shack" together. I was recruited to do the Fred Snyder part, which I executed with limp-wristed abandon.

And then I got up and did Elvis Costello's "Accidents Will Happen" just to make sure the whole bar knew I don't normally thound like that.

Sweetie's signature piece is "Santa Baby", which she trots out once a year around Christmas time.

Foo said...

Jenn: I remember the comment about the 11-year-old target audience. Was that the kid who looks like Peter Brady (Christopher Knight, or whatever his name really is)? Or the reeeally young one that resembles Chicken Little from the recent animated movie?

Speaking of which, my favorite character is Fish Out Of Water.

Turtle said...

The lure of karaoke and singing for me extends almost entirely to church where my mother swears I sound "beautiful." It's there I keep my talents...at home and in the car. I used to do karaoke (before Foo) and am glad I have since moved away from those horrid memories. Foo has a beautiful voice and loves to perform in public. If ya got it, flaunt it! So I'm guilty of getting him into it, but he's good...really good.

Going back to American Idol...
They chose to eliminate the right ones. It'll be interesting watching the rest. As much as I hate to admit it, I hope Chris wins (even if he resembles my ex-con roommate). It's not his fault he looks that way. Go Chris!

Foo said...

For the sake of clarity, turtle's current roommate isn't an ex-con. Her ex-roommate was (or resembled) an ex-con.

But don't let her fool you. She's got a thing for bald guys.

Turtle said...

Oh...hubba hubba. *drool*

Jenn said...

"When your turn to hurt comes Arrrrouuuuund, Honey, I'll break hearts and be as fayst as you..."

I love that song. I saw him in concert with Travis Tritt. Good fun.

Beware, Travis Tritt's, "Here's a Quarter"..it can be devestating to a singer when nearly all in the crowd decide to hurl with great vigor, mind you, their entire change purse contents in your general direction. Ralphie knows it'll put your eye out!!

I'm a Nora Jones kinda gal.

WV: EREPTC
The sudden churning of the stomach when in front of a karaoke crowd.

Foo said...

Let me make sure I've got this right. People throwing money when I sing would be a bad thing?

Go on... pull the other one.

Of all the songs I've done at karaoke, "Fast As You" had probably been the most successful—to the point of being just the teensiest bit disturbing. Before we moved across the metroplex, we used to go to the monthly karaoke show at Fox & Hound. Some places become known as being very supportive of karaoke. This wasn't one of them.

That said, there were a few of the wait staff who always recognized us and would ask "are you singing tonight?" and sometimes "are you singing [song title here]?" But there was this one guy—a customer—who would invariably come up to me as we were showing our IDs at the front desk and make requests. One of his favorites was "Fast As You".

It was flattering but a little unnerving because, Sweetie's overly-charitable evaluation aside, it's not like I'm a great vocalist. Anne would adopt an Elvis sneer and roll her eyes, I'm sure.

Some of the songs that got the best audience response were "Fast As You", Blue County's "Good Little Girls", "Zoot Suit Riot", Kid Rock's "Cowboy", "Church On Cumberland Road", "Man Of Constant Sorrow", and "Long Day".

Tumbleweed moments included "Mexican Radio", "Love Is The Drug", Warren Zevon's "Excitable Boy", The Smiths' "How Soon Is Now", and Robbie Williams' "Lazy Days".

My favorite moment was in the smokey little dive where I did "Love Shack" with Sweetie and her new friend. Lots of rough-looking biker and redneck types playing pool and drinking whiskey shots along the bar, but when the karaoke show started, many would stop and gather around the tables in front of the small stage. I was trying out "If Tomorrow Never Comes" for the first time. About 20 seconds into the song, this guy in a white t-shirt, leather vest, wallet with chain tucked into the hip pocket of his jeans grabbed his gal and got up to slow dance. Others followed.

It's a song that always makes me think of my wife, so when I sing it I'm always just on the verge of choking up. When those people got up to slow dance, there were a couple bars when I wasn't quite sure I was going to make it through.

Jenn said...

Yeah, he DID look like Peter Brady! I hadn't thought of that until you said it.

Lou said...

I liked that duet (Kid Rock/Sheryl Crow) - enough rock and country to keep one off guard.

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